Infuriating business jargon to avoid in your communications

Nauseating business jargon: it’s everywhere. And if I am being frank, it’s a right pain in the arse. And it’s over usage is ironic. Businesses use this type of language in their comms as they think it conveys a sense of professionalism. But what it actually does is turn prospects away.

Ask yourself, would you use words like bespoke when you speak to someone in a normal setting? No of course not.

So if it is your aim not to sound like Patrick Bateman (minus the distorted fantasies of murder and mutilation) then here are some words that I would try and avoid like the bubonic plague. After all, surely you want to sound more like a friend and less like a narcissist.

Synergy – 

Let’s start off with a real “doozy”. This word is actually meant to be used in a scientific context e.g when two chemicals combine to create something which is greater than the sum of its separate parts.

On this basis alone, I wouldn’t be using such a technical term to describe how you want to create a partnership or relationship with a client (which are much better alternatives anyway). Get away from this type of terminology and you will sound much more genuine and less corporate.

Bespoke –

JUST NO. Put it away and don’t let this one near your website, or any type of marketing collateral that you want to produce. Those who know me will tell you that I loathe cucumber with a passion, but this might come in at a close second.

This is basically a pretentious way of saying something is made for you, tailor-made, which sounds much more apt.

Bespoke implies something bordering on exclusivity, which is clearly totally different from what this actually means. Unless you’re a tailor working on Saville Row, this is not a word I would be using.

Gaining traction –

A phrase used ad nauseam in marketing circles to describe something which is gaining popularity. Grammarly calls this “ An infuriating overused buzzword” and I couldn’t agree more.

If you want to say that something is popular just say it. Again, would you ever use such a phrase in a normal conversation?

Don’t try and sound like an astrophysicist for something which is pretty simple to describe.

Disruptive –

Jesus Christ !! If had a pound for every business that describes themselves as disruptive i’d be a multi-millionaire. Perhaps I should form a company and call it disruptive bespoke communications solutions.

But in all seriousness, this is a word that has been used to death. And I got news for you: truly disruptive companies, who are profoundly changing their market, are few and far between. Apologies, but it’s true.

My point is don’t call your business disruptive if it isn’t. Simple. As a prospect, I’d rather a business show me how it can help me with a problem I am having. That would interest me far more.

Be the friendly solution, not something complex and unidentifiable.

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